I Had a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

My hips and knees hurt so bad that I was awake most of the night and
I didn’t have any Tylenol
Jackson woke up at 4 and wanted to play Wii games
Tucker wanted to nurse every hour and
I didn’t get a shower

That’s when I knew it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

Tucker spilled Jackson’s cereal all over the floor so
Jackson threw a hissy fit and stomped on it
Tucker climbed on the counter and sprayed the kitchen with water and
Jackson took off his clothes and ran around the house naked

I think I’ll move to Australia where no one has days like this

I swept up the cereal while
The boys crushed crackers and strawberries on the floor behind me
Tucker climbed behind the TV and
Jackson pushed the phone on his head…after he called Australia

I was having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

I called Seth to tell him but
He was busy shooting snow geese and I had to hang up because
Tucker ripped the cord out of the Wii and
Jackson was standing on top of the fridge

I said they don’t have snow geese in Australia, but I don’t think anyone heard me
It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

We went to Burger King for supper and
Jackson got his muddy boots in my hair
The cashier didn’t give me the boys’ milk and
I got lettuce in my braces

I was having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

I tried to give the boys a bath but
Tucker pooped in the tub and
Jackson peed on my hand
I sprayed water all over the bathroom floor trying to rinse them off
And my clothes got soaked

I said that I won’t be giving them a bath tomorrow
Because I’ll be in Australia

It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

Seth just called and he’s on his way home and
He’s going to watch the boys while I go shopping
With Rachel tomorrow, so
I guess I won’t be moving to Australia

Besides, everyone has bad days
Even in Australia

Oh, and that punk, Alexander, has nothing on me when it comes to terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days